I have been involved with several riders who had amputations, cerebral palsy, intellectual disabilities, crushed spines and polio. Getting to know them is very rewarding. They have helped me a lot. We are all broken in some way, but not all of us show it. Or know it.
One who stands out in my mind is a forty year old man I’ll call Bernard. (Not his real name). He brought in a bike that was not worth fixing. It seems that he has an income from SSI, and does not want for anything. I later learned that he does not get much money, just does not have many wants. He has two guitars, two amps, lots of DVDs and can’t imagine taking a vacation because the people he worked for at that time were really dependent on him for office cleaning, and he did not want to let them down. So he decided to buy a new bike. Eventually he bought three.
I got to know him because he came in at least once a month to rave about how great his bike is and about how much he appreciated someone like me. I do respond to flattery! So I got the courage up to ask him about himself after a year or so. He told me about being a night time office cleaner. I said to him, “I’m sort of embarassed to have you see how messy my store is, since you are a cleaning professional.”
He took this as a job offer! He said that it would take about three hours a week and that for the first couple of months, it would take about double that. And with that he was ready. I showed him the vacuum and the glass cleaner, and he was off. For about three years, he kept the place looking good. He talked a blue streak, and mentioned how lucky he was because he was getting his own apartment, and getting out of the Cornerstone facility where he was living.
However, after some time living on his own, he began to not take his medicine. He was not really able to afford to live on his own, but he did not like to surrender his freedom. He lost lots of weight, stopped wearing his teeth, had no money for cigarettes and began to do a poor job. Due to a misunderstanding, he thought I was firing him one day when I was trying to tell him about keeping himself clean. I have no experience in diplomacy, you see.
Now he is wandering the streets, out of control and collecting cans and bottles. The agency people say that he is not a threat to himself or others so he is still free, which is what he wants. But they also said that if medicaid would pay for high priced drugs, he would be able to be the way he used to be. It seems that the drugs folks like Bernard take have a tendency to become tolerated too much and sometimes lose their efficiency. Folks with good health coverage and who tell the doctor about their change in mood can keep trying better ones as they come on the market. Folks who fear being institutionalized tend to not complain. I wish that I had a happy ending here, but maybe there will be one someday.
I saw him downtown a lot this summer, and he did not look at me, or anyone. I hope that he is warm and safe, and that he can get help. If I don’t see him next year in the warm months, I will fear the worst.